OK So Who Wants To See The Pics of Some NUDE Hot Chicks Please Raise Your Hands!

 OK that's fifty one, no, fifty two, no ninety nine, no...gazillion gazillion numbers to infinity!

Oyyy...what a response!


I could swear that my traffic counter is running frantically like there's no tomorrow there....and still counting!

Oh naughty, naughty you,

Shame on you!

If I am anywhere near you

I would be spanking you black and blue!

(gasp! and it RHYMES!!!!!! OhMyGod!)


What is it about nude chicks pictures that made men swoon and salivate, like they simply lost control of their exocrine glands (yep, that's the gland that control your saliva), and their heart beat wildly like they had been chased by one thousand demons?

 

Salivating Man

                                          Gray's Anatomy 101 : Our Salivary Glands

A Demon...no offense sir, but yours is the kind of face that I wouldn't wish to meet ! But the sight of you could really quicken my heartbeat. And the same thing happens whenever I looked at handsome men. Well I guess that makes you and all handsome men are equal then...





I mean, sheeesh! It's just a body, an anatomy for crying out loud!  What? Stay focused on my subject ? Oh.
Allright.





OK so here goes...the pictures that I had painstakingly snapped of my beautiful, naked hot chicks skinny dipping in their bath tub...

Angelina (Jolie) jumped into the tub, while Prince Henry looked at her longingly.

'Oohhhh this feels sooo good! Where's my rubber duckie ?', said Angie.

Angelina's clumsy exit out of the tub.

His Royal Highness Prince Henry's royal dunk, watched by Christina (Aguilera)

' Errr Your Highness, your time is up!', said Christina, not known for her patience.

                                               My Gorgeous Hot Chicks Having Bath


What ? Not satisfied ? You were thinking of other kinds of nude hot chicks ? The two legged kind?

Get out of here! 

I gotcha, didn't I ?????? hahahahahahahaha


OK cook me!

 

My Black Swans

Black Swan movie poster

Black Swan

Ever seen this movie ?

It's a psychological thriller flick about ballerinas and the emotional stress they had gone through in order to bring out the characters that they are playing. I loved the movie, especially since I really love Natalie Portman. In that movie, Portman played the role of a young ballerina who were so engrossed in the role that she is playing, that she slowly turned insane.

In it, Nina (Portman) played the parts of the innocent White swan and her sensual twin, the Black swan (yes, of course it's THE black swan). However, the more she got into her roles, the more obsessed she is, and then she started to have hallucinations and whatnot.


I particularly love the scene when Nina hallucinated that she is sprouting black feathers and black wings and then fully transformed into a black swan. And my, what a beautiful black swan she is!

Nina, fully transformed into a Black Swan




Which brings me to my own black swans. Oh did I say black swans ? Hell, no! I mean black ducks la. Where got swan one! Bluffing only meh...hahaha...


Anyway...

Remember these babies ?

My little ducks...a few months back


A few months ago I published an entry about them. Look at how small they are. They can fit in one small bucket. And gosh, they are sooooooooooooo cute and so small! Ops. Not are. Were. As in the past tense.


Now all 10 of them had grown up into adult ducks. And they are sooooooooooooo randy! Especially the four male ducks. And they are all black in colour. So I dubbed them, the All-Blacks gang. And I am not kidding about them being randy. They are as randy as a seventeen year old boy who had just encountered 'heaven on earth', so to speak. Or a seventy year old who wants to re-enter the 'heaven on earth' orbit - probably with a little help from Mr Viagra the little blue pill. Or Tongkat Ali. Or tiger's heart. Or whatever that works for them.



My point is, my All Blacks are soooooo rowdy and randy and soooo ever ready for some vertical kind of exercises, with the poor defenseless female ducks below them. Oyy!



I mean, I've seen how a poor defenseless female ran for her dear life (and probably chastity!) after she was being cornered by my blackies! And when she surrendered and one of the Blackie got on top of her, the other 3 hovered nearby. And when the Blackie on top of the poor lady duck took too much time, there is always one stupid Blackie who climbed on top of the other Blackie, making a delicious sandwich of 3 ducks. A threesome, oh yeah how exotic and kinky right ? Bzzzzzzz. Wrong.


The order of the sandwich is wrong. The poor female is the far at the bottom, and the other 2 randy Blackies are on top of each other. Well, probably a gay kind of threesome. Ho yeah! My own little Mardi Gras parade! How wonderful! And talk of Mardi Gras parade, yep, yours truly was there on Sydney Mardi Gras parade, back in the year 2001, and I vaguely recalled that there is some uncanny resemblance between my little duckies and those joining the parade. Hmmmm....interesting! But bear in mind that I was just watching the parade, NOT joining the parade OK! I'm straight as an arrow!




Anyway, since those 4 All-Blacks are getting sooooooo sexed up, I have no choice but to capture one of them, and turn him into a delicious rendang itek!



Hmmmmmm...which brings me to create my own philosophy...


DON'T GET TOO SEXED UP.
OR YOU'LL END UP AS SOMEONE'S RENDANG ITEK!



Good advise, isn't it? Might put an instant stop to those highly sexed up studs!


OK, I want to get back to my 3 randy All-Blacks studs and ducks fornication ohmygod, I am soooo don't have a life isn't it ???? Sigh...OK now I'm depressed...*sulking*...



I'm sooooo depressed...leave me alone!

Just let me crawl into my cave so that I can enjoy my depression...


A close up pic of me when I'm depressed. Yeah, I'm blonde and I'm white when I'm depressed. That's why I try very hard not to get depressed. You know, coz I really treasure my Asian heritage....(hahaha!)


Well ...till then, take care !

Enter The Sleeping Dragon : Blog Hibernation

A Dragon : A Mythical Creature... Pic from the Net

In the jungle the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight
In the jungle the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight
Hush my darling don't fear my darling the lion sleeps tonight
Hush my darling don't fear my darling the lion sleeps tonight
Aa-eeeee---eeee--iii---a-wimbawe.....



Oh yes, I love that song, from the great animation movie, The Lion King...



Except that I'm not a lion, but a dragon...or a dragon-ness...whatever that means.


The thing is, I'm a sleeping dragon, hibernating into a deep, deep slumber, lazying myself into nothingness and feeling damn great about it.

Yep, that's exactly how I feel now.





It seems like the new year of the dragon had unleashed a lazy dragon in me. Well, at least for my blog. No, correction, I take that back.

ESPECIALLY for my blog.

Sigh....


I just don't know why but I suddenly lack the mojo to update my blog.

The truth is, I got nothing interesting to share. My life is boring, I'm a chauffeur/chef/nurse for the sicks/a teacher/tutor (especially during exams), a judge/a referee(yeah got lots of judge/referee duties), a house cleaner, a launderer bla bla bla the list goes on.

And yep, I am also a surrogate mom to 17 ducks, 6 birds and 6 quails.

Talk about being a busy dragon!


So that is why I am lacking the time to continuously update my blog.


Yeah rite!


The cold hard truth is, I am too damn lazy to sit in front of my cute little netbook and update my blog.




I might as well go back to my slumber and dream of fire breathing dragons....hmmmmm sounds intriguing!

I've Got Multiple "O", Wooohooo!!!!

Finally!


The big, multiple 'O', and it's mine! MINE! Gasp!


Oh yeah baybeeee!!!!




After years of secretly wondering if I would be able to achieve the infamous multiple 'O', this week I had eventually succeeded to taste the sweet, sweet victory of such prime achievement.


And there is only on word to sum up how I feel about that, and it's 'Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....' with pure contentment and deep, deep profound satisfaction.

Yeah baby, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......


Oh yes, it sure feel good!

It's like entering nirvana, so exquisitely satisfying and intensely pleasureable and sinfully addictive!

And I did it all, by myself ! Yep, I DIY to get the big O!

Isn't it great ?

Am I terrific or what ?

And let me tell you, it was not an easy task.



I had to spend hours and hours of my precious time to obtain the big 'O'. It took me countless frustrations and heartaches when my numerous attempts simply failed. I had many hiccups and breakdowns , many clenched, unsatisfied fists and many cries of despair over my failed attempts, but I persevered and overcame those hiccups and breakdowns, and yes, I was finally able to feel the deep, deep satisfaction of sweet, sweet victory.


And once I managed to master the tricks, there is no stopping me! I am insatiable and lustful, always wanting more and more, completely addicted to the great "O" acts. The very minute I though that I had completely sated, some new rush of adrenaline kicks in, and I found myself enslaved to such conducts. Addicted, intoxicated, completely lost...and I'm lovin' it! Yeah baybee!!!!


And I did it all, thanks to the step-by-step instructions, courtesy of the Internet.

Yep, I got my multiple 'O' by patiently and wholeheartedly studying the diagrams available on the Internet. Cool huh ? And to think that those writers also uploaded their step-by-step videos explaining how to achieve the big O, on YOUTUBE !


Hoyeahhhhh!!!!! Hail to the Internet, to the world wide web for making everything so possible!


And like a wet, hungry sponge, I soaked all the knowledge there is about getting the big O. It seems like there are many, many ways to achieve the great, big "O", and I tried everything that my lustful heart desired.


I tried the one about jumping froggy and got really excited.

I did the one about the handsome boat and I'm nearly drowned.

I reached for the stars and feel the earth move under my feet.

I did the one about boxes and felt so claustrophobic.

I fantasised about ninjas using shuriken stars as their secret weapon, and I nailed it.


And yep, I even managed to reach the big O by riding fire-breathing dragons and I almost cried in ecstasy, for the dragon is the one of the most trickiest acts in doing origami!



What ?

What the heck am I talking about ?

You think that I was babbling about the great big multiple "O" as in reaching multiple ORGASM ?

You think that I was reciting KamaSutra ?

Haha, so sorry to mislead you guys, but the great, multiple O that I was talking about is the art of making ORIGAMI lohhhhh!


Oh yes. I had been very very busy this week, I got myself glued to my tiny netbook and painstakingly followed such intricate and complicated steps in the arts of paper folding. And yep, you can expect that the air around me was foul with various and numerous swear words that came out of my irresistable, sexy sweet lips.

Well, I blame my boys for my newest hobby. They had forever been nagging me to do some origami for them, so last week I took the plunge, and boy, I was completely sold -lock, stock and barrel, so to speak.



A Jumping Frog (right), a sweet little boat (center) and a puffed up star (left).
Note : The star is not completely puffed up, and I blame the paper for that!





My Jumping Little Red Frog (yep, I painted the eyes and the dots on Froggy!), two Shuriken stars/ninja weapon in pink and light blue, and a sweet, sweet pink little boat.





Two Dragons, all to usher in the good year of the Dragon.
Note : Somehow, I secretly think that the dragons bore some slight resemblance to my darling duckies.

The air around me was blacker and fouler than usual when I I was in the progress of doing the dragons. You see, there are like 200 steps in making an origami dragon, and I was doing fine until step number 145, and realised that I had folded the paper the wrong way and had to start all over again! And yes I am exaggerating!


And talk about the dragons, well, here's wishing you all a


Happy and prosperous Chinese New Year!

Gong Xi Fa Chai!


Ok now I want to go back to my great big 'O'....

My First Time...

Ah, yes. The first time. The first time is always the most special one, right ? The one that you would never forget, the one that you would always cherish in your heart, and God help it, it's most probably the one memory that you would take to your grave.

The first time is always the most special one.

Rod Stewart said : The first cut is the deepest.

Diana Ross said : My first love, you're every breath that I take/ you're every step I made....

And Bruno Mars, bless his awesome voice and sexy-licous style, crooned :


I feel like dancing the night away. Feels like just yesterday we danced for the first time,
for the first time,
remember our first time, time, time, time, time, ta ta ta ta ta ta oooh. Let's let the music keep our bodies awake. Feels like im touching you right now for the first time,
for the first time, remember our first time,
time, time, time, time, ta ta ta ta ta ta oooh. I think i might explode, this tension is so cold. And all this fighting between us is really getting old. We need a magic touch, before it all blows up. We've both had enough, we've both had enough. So let's just get away, go to that special place. Where we first met and on the floor my feet were swept away. Baby it's worth a try, i beleive in you and i. Only takes just one night.. Before we both give in.. Don't let it end.. Let's form the love again. I feel like dancing the night away. Feels like just yesterday we danced for the first time,
for the first time, remember our first time,
time, time, time, time, ta ta ta ta ta ta oooh. Let's let the music keep our bodies awake. Feels like im touching you right now for the first time,
for the first tome, remember our first time, time, time, time, time, ta ta ta ta ta ta oooh. Before we both give in..
Don't let it end.. Let's form the love again. Oooh.. I feel like dancing the night away. Feels like just yesterday we danced for the first time,
for the first time, remember our first time,
time, time, time, time, ta ta ta ta ta ta oooh. Let's let the music keep our bodies awake. Feels like im touching you right now for the first time,
for the first time, remember our first time,
time, time, time, time, ta ta ta ta ta ta oooh.

The First Time/Bruno Mars


Wow, Isn't he awesome ? And I remembered my very own first time...sigh...


Ahhhh. I would never, ever forget the first time I did 'it'. I was nervous and bashful and scared, and didn't quite know what to expect of my first experience. And my brothers and sisters and friends and relatives kept on teasing me about the first experience that I would encounter, and those teasings made me even more frightful.

I remembered that I kept on thinking. Would I enjoy my first experience ? Would it hurt ? Would it give me pleasure ? Or pain ? Would I be brave ? Or would I shy down and flee in shame ? Would I like it ? Would I hate it ? Would I enjoy it so much that I want to do it again and again and again ? Or would I hate it so much that I would turn away, never to do it again ?


Ah. So many questions, but I got no answer. I asked 10 people, but they gave me 10 different answers, all conflicting with one another, and making me even more confused.


So I got no choice, but to take a deep breath, and face the unknown.


On the day before I had my 'first experience', I felt quite ill. I remembered feeling nauseous and vulnerable. It felt like there were hundreds of butterflies were doing some serious party inside my stomach. And I remembered getting cold feet and yep, I did seriously considered running away from home, just so I can escape from facing my 'first experience'. But there is no escape. All roads lead to Rome, and I simply had to face the inevitable, and go to Rome, so to speak.

And on the day itself, I was a total nervous wreck. I tried to stay calm, but deep inside I was torn with multiple emotions. I was shy, yet I want 'it' so badly. I was nervous, yet I want to enjoy having my 'first time'. I don't want to sound too eager, but I know that I would want to do 'it' over and over and over again, unashamedly...


And so I did....


I really enjoyed my first time.

It was soooooo beautiful, just as I imagined it to be.

And I was brave and courageous and I really enjoyed having my first experience.

And hell, yes yes yes!!!! I want to do 'it' over and over again!!!!!

Sigh...

Yes, my first experience at school was soooooo beautiful.

What, pardon me ? You think I was talking about what ?

Shame on you !!!!! hahaha


Anyway, this entry is dedicated to all first timers at school, regardless they are in playschool, kindergarten or primary school or even college or university, or whatever. You guys rock, and I hope that you would enjoy your first time, just like I enjoyed mine.

And in my own kingdom of heaven, I got 2 first timers at school. My Ultraman #2, who is going for his primary school, entering standard 1 of a national primary school, and my Ultraman #3, who is on entering kindergarten.



With my hubby is often away due to his work, you can guarantee that my mornings are always a pure mayhem and madness and chaos, and that indeed, is another of my beautiful 'first time experience'...yeah, keep on rockin bebeh!


My 3 Ultramen, about to embark on a lifelong journey of their life...


Ultraman #3, who is looking like he is going to puke, just outside his kindergarten.





My boys at recess.

The End Is Near : Panic Time!

Oh yeah.

The end is soooooo very, very near for 2011. 2012 will rear its face in just 2 days away, and suddenly I felt so overwhelmed with all the things that had happened and didn't happen in 2011.



And yep, it's time to make fresh resolutions again. But seriously, I forgot what was my resolution for 2011. Haiyya, so terrible kan ? But what do you expect from a mother to 4 very very active and sturdy young boys, who is also a surrogate mother to 8 adult ducks, 10 ducklings, and enough caged birds to replace the infamous Angry Bird character ?



Gaaaaaaaaaaa.

2012 is just two days away, and I still don't have any resolution. Time to hit that panic button!!!














I must prepare some very plausible resolution for 2012 so that when people ask me about my new year resolution I can look so sophisticated and tell them all the nonsense that will be sure to make their eyes cross and brain nerves swooning like mad so in the end they wouldn't understand a thing about my new year resolution. Ergo, if they don't understand my resolution how can they smirk at me if I don't achieve my new year resolution, right ? You are scratching your head while reading this, so I know that I am halfway thru. Yes!


Wait. Did I mention Angry Birds before this ? Yes ? Uh-oh, some light bulb is flashing like mad in my brain. Some sort of storm is brewing inside my brain cells, interconnecting all the neurons with some sort of logical and plausible reasoning. Urgh.



Angry Birds app logo. Pic from Net




This is one of the most famous n fast growing game, ever! But I never play the game. Reason being : I don't own any Apple product. :(


Say that again ?

That very last sentence in particular.

And Bingo!


Now you have it.


Mental Note : Must put having an Apple product as one of my 2012 resolution.
Yep IPhone 4S, come to Mommy!!!!



Of course, by the time I own an Iphone 4S, Apple had probably come out with Iphone 11S, or whatever, but at least for the time being I can relax and exhale because I already have a resolution, no matter how short or lame my resolution is!


Happy New Year, people! Have a great year ahead!

Burying A Queen of Heart

Today I buried my very first dead creature, and it was not a beautiful experience.


It was a rainy day. I wished that I could just snuggle in front my 40 inch LCD, watching a bunch of cute Korean boys flaunting their good stuffs while singing to some mindless but catchy tunes, but I can't delay the inevitable any longer. I've got to do it.


Now! Pronto! Sekarang!


So with a heavy heart, I grabbed a shovel and made my way towards a quiet, secluded place at the back of my lawn. It was dead quiet except for the soft sounds of the rain hitting the soft grounds underneath my feet.

My heart was thudding wildly. Can I pull this act ? Do I have the guts to do the deed ? Would I have enough strength to dig the earth beneath me? And an even bigger question, would I be able to lift my 'victim' and bury her underground ?

Argh. Too many questions. Too many regrets.

And I got tears rolling on my cheeks when I remembered that SHE is gone.

I regret it that she died. I loved her. But she died. And I need to bury her.

And more and more big, fat tears came rolling down my cheeks. Outside, the rain keeps on falling, matching my dark, sinister mood. Inside, I felt like a world class murderer, trying to cover up her first kill.

Maybe a female version of Ted Bundy. Or Kane. Or was it Abel ?


Argh. Doesn't matter.


She's gone, and I've got to bury the dead. No prejudice. And I took a deep, cleansing breath, and fought back the new wave of tears that threaten to come down again.


So I grabbed the shovel, and started digging. I dug and dug and dug till my arms ached, and I gasped out of breath from exhaustion. The pit in front of me should be sufficient for her great, beautiful body. That would be perfect to lay her down to rest.


And so I reached for her, and ever so gently, I lifted her lifeless little body and put her down in the pit. I almost cried again when I saw her.


Oh Cleopatra, why did you die ?


Woke up today, and found out that my Cleopatra is dead.
COD : Unknown




My sweet Cleopatra in her final resting place. RIP, Cleo...


Yep. Cleopatra - my lovely duck had died mysteriously, and since my hubby is away on a business trip, I got the honor (or horror?) to bury her.


Oh I really loved her.

She was so beautiful, majestic and regal. A true queen material. Hence the name Cleopatra, after one of the greatest queen in the ancient time, the time of the pharaohs.


Oh Cleo, I will miss you.

RIP, my little queen.