Having A Braxton

Recently I am always having a Braxton.


Nope...I'm not talking about Tony Braxton although I must state here that I love Tony Braxton's songs...well, this had opened up a floodgate to my own memory lane...let me see....I remembered Tony's hits - Un-break My Heart, How Could An Angel Break My Heart...etc etc

Gosh those were my heartbreak songs,back when I was young and innocent...


I remembered how I used to play those songs over and over again, and crying myself to sleep over that sorry excuse of a guy! Talk about being young and dumb and clueless...sigh....

And Ms Braxton got such a beautiful voice, and a crazy, sexy beautiful body that she flaunts freely..........




Damn, she's got a beautiful bod....maybe I should put a rating to my blog....oh la la....


Whoops. There I go again, cakap keluar tajuk, dah sampai ke Laut Artik.....sorry, boys n girls!!!!

Now let's get back to topic. It seems that I'm always having a Braxton now. For the ignoramus, I'm talking about THE Braxton Hicks contraction. Here's something from Wiki...

Braxton Hicks contractions, also known as false labor or practice contractions are sporadic uterine contractions that usually start around 6 weeks however are not usually felt until the second trimester or third trimester of pregnancy.^[1]

So every now and then, I would feel this sharp cramp in my tummy.

And although I am still high like a kite with my chocolate addiction, this Braxton Hicks contractions bring me back to earth. It is like a big, giant warning to me. A red alert, so to speak. And hell, I respected that alert. It is boss...

And it took me down my memory lane of labor rooms and labor pains and I started to panic that I forgot how to breathe............gasp...aku kurang oksigen !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


And so I reached down for another bite of Snickers, Kit Kat, Cadburry's, Cloud 9 and my other chocolate friends to comfort me...sigh....

Memoir Untuk Ary : Rest In Peace.....sob...sob.....

Hari ini aku tulis entry dalam bahasa ibunda aku...Kerana aku sedang menjalani tempoh berkabung 40 hari......

Ya...berkabung atas kehilangan Ary...bukan Ari Wibowo...tapi Pengeran Putera Arowana Mudzaffar Shah...iaitu arowana peliharaan Teddy........

Aku pun tak pasti macam mana Ary boleh mati tiba-tiba...sudden death case la ni...dan aku memang telah berhempas pulas cuba menyelamatkan Ary...sumpah ! Aku cuba tukar air akuarium tu, namun Ary menghembuskan napas terakhirnya pada saat yang penuh kritikal itu...maybe aku patut buat CPR kat Ary....huhuhuhu..................


owh ARy....kenapa kau pergi sekarang ???? kenapa ??????? why ?????
aku bersedih meratap pilu atas pemergianmu..................









well....the truth is....aku bukan sedih sangat atas pemergian Ary.....tapi akusedih sebab aku tahu lepas ni mesti Teddy akan beli ikang lain.............................


dan bersama itu............musnahlah impian golang omeh kerawang yg aku dah intai kat Poh Kong semalam !!!!!!!!!!! (cue gambo pompuan jelita tengah histeria nangeh !...aku la tu)



owh Ary..............ko musnahkan impianku............................



Ary dalam kenangan...kau pergi dengan membawa impian golang omeh kerawangku.....

Confession : I'm Having An Affair

Yes. I am having an affair. A lusty, full of secrets love affair. Well, actually I am rekindling my long lost affair with my old flame...

My first meaningful encounter was in my teenage years.

And I remembered every moments like it was just yesterday...

I remembered the first time I encountered C (yes, for reason of anonymity, let's just call it C)....The first time I touched C.....sigh....it was ectasy....it was soooooo deeply satisfying, it was everything that I expected it to be, and I was simply hooked to C after that. Addicted, hooked, enslaved....

And back then, I know C is bad for me, but I just couldn't help it. It was like a forbidden love, yet it was so exciting ! But as I grew older, I learned to control my desire, and so I kicked C out of my life, although not completely. Once in a while, I still bow down to my desire, and rekindle my romance with C.

As now...sigh...


C came back into my life with a vangeance, making every lost moment count. And I was helpless, powerless to fight C's magnetism, so once again I let myself to be swept off my feet and let C satisfy my basic desire....

Ummmmmmmmmmm...C is still marvelous. One forbidden bite again, and I am deeply satisfied. It is a lustful feeling. I love C and I simply must have C everyday...yes, as we say it in Malay, hari-hari mau!!!!!!!!


I simply love the dark, velvety sensation of C in my mouth. Feels like heaven! Oh yes, yes yes !!!!



And my husband Teddy knows about my fling with C, and he doesn't mind it at all.......













Why should he mind ? We are soooo open what....



After all, C is my lusty love affair with Mr Chocolate!!!!


Again, I blame my pregnancy hormone for awakening my long asleep cravings for chocolate....

OK, I gotta go....gotta to rekindle my lusty affair with chocolate....

Babe, You Take My Breath Away...

Nowadays, I am always breathless. Someone is sure to take my breath away. Lots and lots of breath and I am not even asthmatic to begin with.

But here's the punch line, the person responsible to cause me to be breathless all the time is a temporary resident inside my womb. Yep baby, you are the culprit!


I am now entering the dreaded third trimester of pregnancy. This is when I would be transformed into a heavy truck, the kind that is filled up to the ceilings with loads. My friend Adrian used to call me Penguin when I was in my third trimester with my first pregnancy. He said that I grow bigger (what he meant was my tummy grew bigger OK!), my style of walk resembles how a penguin walk. And I sweetly told him that yeah, vice versa Ade! (gosh I hope that he is not reading this haha)



Well picture this. When I stand up straight and when I look down below, I can't see my own feet, even if I tried to suck my breath to tuck in my tummy ! Oh I tried to cheat by peeping over the big mound of my tummy, but still, no sign of my own two feet. The only way I can see them is by leaning forward, and that, is indeed a wrong move to make. You see, like a heavy truck, my center of gravity had shifted somewhere else, and I am very very prone to lost my balance and toppled over ! Sigh....


And when I lie down to sleep, I mean lying straight on my back, I would be breathless. Yep you guess it right, my big tummy will press against my lungs, and cause me to be breathless.

I would be breathless after dinner, lunch and breakfast (hey I AM eating for two OK!). I would be breathless after I climb the stairs. Heck, I am breathless just by sitting in front of my laptop and surfing the net (which I do, like 23 hours in a day!) haha...





And don't let me start with my bellybutton...sigh..I had always been an innie all of my life...and now, suddenly, my bellybutton is inside out !!!!!!!!!!!! sigh.......


Note : This is not my bellybutton, but it sure is close haha





but wait.........am I complaining ?

Heck no !!! I am enjoying every second of my pregnancy !!!!!

Yeah right babe.........

Epilog Sepi si Perindu

Epilog Sepi Si Perindu

Sayang,
Jiwaku resah diulit selautan rindu
Hatiku rawan dicuit segunung kasih

senyummu
tawamu
bicaramu
kamu

aku rindu kamu

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

aku terpana
kucari dikau
namun kau tiada disisi
lalu aku meratapi ketiadaanmu

sungguh aku sepi tanpamu
lalu aku melakar sketsa rindu ini
sebagai satu manifestasi
rindu pada diri mu.............







ha amacam.........besh tak sajak kat ateh tu ? aku buat sendiri tu tawwwwwwwww....spontan jer....huh aku layan jiwang....jiwang karat lak tu .....

so apasal tetiba aku layan jiwang ? aku nak masuk deklamasi sajak ke ? nak anto ke majalah ke ? masuk peraduan ke ? untuk buku baru ke ? dedikasi kat Teddy ke ?????


oh tidak tidak..................


sajak tu aku buat sebab aku rindu tahap gaban dengan otomen sulung aku yang masih kat kampung, kat umah Opah dia.................


aku call henpon Opah dia 3-4 kali sehari sebab nak dengo suara dia....aku rasa Opah dia merangkap ibu mertua aku pun mesti menyesal suh tinggalkan otomen dengan dia masa cuti sekolah ni sebab aku asik2 tepon jerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr hahaha


abih nak buat camano..................I'm just a mother...................

come back baby
come back safely to me...............


dah buat lagi dahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......


(alah OK lagi dari gambo posting kangkung belacan made in USA, ikang bilis siam beli kat Tulsa hahaha)


Nota : gambo kat ateh tu adalah satu cilokan semata mata...
photo credits to: pdphoto.org

Caught !

OK lah, entri kali ni aku cakap Melayu la puloks...kang ada yang hengat aku lagi ngengada feeling ahmerikans, over lak dari jeran blog aku yang dah pindah duk Tulsa tuh....

Alkisahnya...udah dua purnama rumah aku ditumpangi oleh seekor makhluk halus. Ini seriyes! (tang ni ikut versi Wonderpets OK). Makhluk ni kecil, bergigi taring dengan kuku yang tajam lagi hitam. Muncungnya panjang, badannya halus dan ekornya jugak panjang. Ha! korang dah seram bulu ketiak ? So apakah spesies mahkluk halus ini ?

Adakah ia jenglot ? Toyol ?antu raya ? Jerangkung dalam lemari ? atau spesies antu omputeh (memandangkan aku suka nengok citer omputeh) seperti vampire ? poltergeist ? atau Ju-On iaitu antu Korea ???? Apa ????

hoh...napas korang dah laju dah...takut la tuh...hek ellehh...kalau pasal citer antu.....


anyways................

Makhluk halus yang menumpang kat umah aku tu tiada lam senarai kat atas. Sebab apa ....


Sebab yang tompang umah aku tu ialah bernama CTK.

Apa ? Ada kena mengena dengan Datok CT dan Datok K dak ?? errrr....dak aihhh...

CTK tu ialah singkatan untuk CT Kus lah............ heh heh


so dah 2 bulan CTK duk tompang kat umah aku. Aku declare war sebab dia dah siap beranak kat kabinet tibi umah aku....eeuuwwwwwww....gross...........

So dah 2 malam aku pasang mousetrap....malam pertama, umpan dia makan, tapi tak kena tangkap....choiiii....

so aku bising2 kat Teddy, suh dia beli racun tikuih...aku dah tak tahan...kang anak dia berlari berkejaran ngan aku lak kang.........Balik keje Teddy kasi aku 2 tin kecik....mouse glue...hadoiiiii.........takmo kasi racun kunun....ellehhhhh....takut aku racun dia la tuh hahaha....



Anyway, semalam anak CTK dah masuk perangkap.....alahai.........bila dah kena tangkap aku tatau nak buat apa lak....nak bantai tak sampai ati...nak jirus air panas, ish kejam lak rasa....aku nak buat cam kaktek buat....jemo kat tengah paneh sampai mampoih, tapi Teddy tak kasi...kijam katanya.......ellehhhhhhhhhhhhhh.................ko lagi kijam padaku Teddy !!!! hetyu! errr fokusssss..........



so anak CTK tu masih terperangkap lam trap tu...takdak penyelesaian jugak pada masalah CTK neh................


so baik aku layan citer romen lagi....hohoho

Wind Beneath My Wings

oh I am soooo easily moved to tears nowadays. You can sneak behind my back and say BOO!, and I would be reduced to tears...



Like earlier today, for instance, HBO was playing Ever After:A Cinderella Story, and I used my veto power againts my boys and threaten them that there would be no lunch if they didn't allow me to watch that movie ...and my threat worked just fine, and so I watch the movie (again ??!!!!), and I got teary eyed and I sobbed gently when Cinderalla faced some down time in winning the Prince's heart......Gosh, I even cried when they were finally together, ever after.....

sigh.....I know it sound sooooo cheesy, but I just couldn't help it...

Maybe it's the pregnancy hormone, or some other things that made me soooo emotionally hung up now...(hint: yes, it's the other things, the pregnancy hormone excuse was just a smokescreen hohoho)


Anyway............


Here's another song that has that tear-gas effect on me.......I especially love Bette Midler's version........


Notakaki :
This is a song that I will always attribute to my parents (May Allah rest their souls), and now, it's a song that reminds me of my boys.......


"Wind Beneath My Wings"

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
It must have been cold there in my shadow,
to never have sunlight on your face.
You were content to let me shine, that's your way.
You always walked a step behind.

So I was the one with all the glory,
while you were the one with all the strength.
A beautiful face without a name for so long.
A beautiful smile to hide the pain.

Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
but I've got it all here in my heart.
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.
I would be nothing without you.

Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

Did I ever tell you you're my hero?
You're everything, everything I wish I could be.
Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

Oh, the wind beneath my wings.
You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings.
Fly, fly, fly away. You let me fly so high.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.

Fly, fly, fly high against the sky,
so high I almost touch the sky.
Thank you, thank you,
thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings.

OK now I want to crawl back into my cave, and brood.........yeah, I'm a cave woman after all....lol!